Picking 'The' Dress!

So, when it comes to finding a wedding dress, your wedding dress, it seems that every girl wants to find that 'special one' which just makes you gleam with pride and joy when you fit it on.

Initially, I wasn't convinced that any wedding dress would look good on me. I'm not exactly a girly girl, I have alternative tastes and I like different things but when it came to my wedding dress, strangely, I wanted something traditional.

I had decided that I wanted to wear ivory as I thought this would suit my pale complexion the best (this is what I was told anyway!). I had also decided that I wanted my dress to include a fitted bust and lace-up back with boning to ensure it sucked and tucked me in at the right places!

The bottom of the skirt was decidedly going to be big, but not too big. I wanted wedding dress not princess dress!

Although I had a clear image of the style of dress I desired, I really had no clue if this type of dress would suit my figure.

Then the question came, what if I fall in love with a dress that I dislike?

Now, strange as that question may be, I am 99.9% sure that some bride, somewhere, has gone through this turmoil and been completely dumbstruck by her conflicting feelings.

For example, you have a style, an image of your 'dream' dress fixed firmly in your mind. You go to a bridal shop and after fitting on nearly every single dress in the store you find the 'one'.

The only probably is you don't actually love this dress.

It looks superb on, fits like a glove, hugs your figure perfectly, shows your best assets and has your mother crying by just the mere sight of it on her precise daughter. You like it to, you can see it is, in a word, perfect for you. But on the other hand your not crazy about it, and you find yourself looking around other dresses on the rails in desperation...this can't be the only dress that suits me!!

This begs the question, 'what's actually wrong with it?'.

Well, the answer is simple, there is nothing wrong with it, but you know there is nothing 'right' about it when you simply don't experience that feeling that every other bride seems to harp on about. Butterflies tickling your tummy in pure pleasure and excitement just thinking about how beautiful you will look on your wedding day in it. You, instead, seem somehow indifferent about the whole situation.

A sensible bride, would indeed, I'm positive buy the dress that suits her so heavenly. Despite the fact that she doesn't feel that 'special' feeling when she fits it on.

A thoughtful bride would perhaps ponder other dresses, try on a few more until she is convinced that the dress that so stunningly suits her, is in fact the 'one' and ignores her gut reaction.

A rebellious bride would not buy the dress. Instead she would search until she finds an alternative dress that she loves the look of, even if it doesn't quite suit her at her best.

Now which bride would be the most popular I wonder? Would more people turn into the sensible bride, treating her wedding day as some sort of business deal, every little detail to be perfect and correct in every single way or would the majority of people be that rebellious bride that doesn't go by the book, instead opting for something she truly loves and desires.

I would bet that, unfortunately, most brides would turn into Mrs Sensible. This is not to impose on that particular brides personality or substance, but simple in a desperate attempt to be the bride that is beautifully perfect and pristine I believe it may be the case that the majority of brides actually wants her dress to please others, not herself.

Maybe we should just wear whatever dress we want, not because it suits our figure, or is the right colour for our skin complexion but just because we love it. We get that feeling in the pit of our stomach that just tells us that this dress is the one. That dress is the dress you most desire, and after all it is your wedding day. The first day of the rest of your life. Maybe we should all just start as we mean to go on?

The Ordering Process

OK, so I have my selection of dress at the ready, I am happy and confident with the website I intend to order from and the money is sitting in my bank just waiting to be spent on the ultimate buy of my life so far (well except for the house that is!!!).

I decided to go down the route of having a dress customised to fit me exactly, i.e. custom measurements as opposed to the standard UK sizes.

The reason for going down this route is simple. I want my dress to fit perfectly. Going by the UK 'standard' sizes listed on the website my actual measurements could be anywhere from a size 14 to a size 24!!

The only problem with going for this option is the fact that, as it is custom made for your measurements and your measurements only, if it doesn't end up fitting you correctly you may not return it according to their t & c's.

Obviously once the dress has arrived, assuming the measurements aren't too far off your actual size then I am more then willing to get the dress altered by a local seamstress. After all, with saving so much money on buying the dress cheap I really don't mind spending a little extra on getting it perfect. If, that is, it isn't already perfect:)

So, I decide that I definitely need help with my measurements as I can't measure myself accurately. This is where my good old nanny came into play!

Once all measured (this is actually quite a lengthy process if you want to get it perfectly correct and accurate), I then order the dress, pay via paypal and email my measurements (as per the form supplied within the website).

The measurements that are needed quite varied and I was quietly reassured by this. My thinking of it was that with so many measurements required of so many body parts the dress has got to fit at least a few places correctly!

After my bit was all done and dusted I wondered as to when or whether I would hear back from them with some form of confirmation. To be honest I wasn't hopeful that I would hear back instantly but I was secretly hoping that I would be slightly surprised and they would email me back promptly, confirming my special order.

I wasn't disappointed. First I received my paypal receipt, which is a usual standard procedure. This felt like a security blanket in case any disputes came up at a later date. I would certainly recommend using paypal, as I find their customer service to be of a pleasing standard and, as mentioned before, it just gives you that extra little 'piece of mind' when buying products on the internet.

The next day followed an email confirmation from the website. The details were a little brief, or maybe just to the point rather. It clearly confirmed what I had ordered, dress design, colour and 'custom size', which led me to believe that they had at least received my email in regards to my measurements. It also informed me of the delivery schedule, 6-7 weeks, which I had been expecting. There was also mention of them emailing me a tracking code as and when they send out my dress so I can track the delivery of my dress. I thought this was an excellent and valuable idea. I know as soon as they give me that tracking number I will be addicted to the updates, following my dress half way around the country in angst and anticipation!

I had also ordered, at the same time, an underskirt (3 hoop) which cost an additional sum of money but was still extremely reasonable. There was no mention of this in my email confirmation although my paypal receipt had stated the correct amount I had paid.

Trying not to overly worry about this I thought of the following reasons as to why that extra detail had been missed out.

1. Maybe they were treating my 'underskirt' order as a separate and perhaps they would send the underskirt out before the dress? Hence perhaps the reason of not confirming that detail in amongst the details of the dress.

2. Perhaps, as the underskirt is just an added extra, they didn't think this as of any particular importance compared to my dress details so didn't include that information on the email. Hopefully though, they will have acknowledged it and just send it along with my dress.

3. Maybe they don't send confirmations for underskirts? Ok, kind of clutching at straws now, but hey, it's got to be worth a least a thought!

With these reasons being noted, I will I'm sure, be in contact with the company within the next few weeks just to make sure they know to send my underskirt along with my dress.

Panic over....for now!

www.yourbridalwear.com - The site I have personally ordered my dress from!

Introduction

Hi, my name is Roxy and I have decide to write this blog in order to help out people in the same or similar situation to me.

The situation I found myself in very recently was the increasly popular debate as to whether or not to splash out nearly a grand on a wedding dress for my 'big day'.

Right from the offset I decided that I was to either hire a wedding dress or buy a cheaper alternative from the Internet. But as usually my mind wandered further a field and I decided that I should really go and try on a few dresses in a bridal shop, just to see which styles suited me and which to avoid like the plague.

As soon as I had made the appointment I instantly felt a little guilty, knowing full well that I wasn't intending on buying any of their dresses but instead to use their dresses as some sort of template for my budgeting ways.

My mum convinced me to keep the appointment and cherished the thought of sharing this new experience with her eldest daughter! I have to admit, I was more then a little excited too!

As soon as we entered the shop I felt instantly welcomed and relaxed. We were told to pick out a few dresses I liked the look of. My mother was somewhat more enthusiastic then I was, with every dress she picked up came an 'ooohhh' or an 'ahhh' as she made comments about how lovely (and heavy) every single dress was.

I on the the other hand was a little harder to please but all the same found a selection of dresses I was vaguely interested in trying on. The service was friendly and as I suspected I quickly fell in love with one particular dress as soon as I saw my shapely silhouette highlighted in the beautiful embellished taffeta gown.

Unfortunately I didn't fall in love with the price tag...£795.00!

This may be reasonable for some brides with a big budget wedding but for little old me this was simply not 'do-able' or reasonable. I could not justify spending nearly £800.00 on a dress that I would only wear for one day, well to be precise to wear for one half of a day! Plus I knew my husband-to-be would be very uncomfortable with the fact that 'a dress' had cost just a little less then he had earned in a whole month!

Then it came...the 'what ifs' and 'maybes' that I started to generate in my mind. My mother didn't exactly help as she too fell in love with the dress and even told me she would help pay for it if I really wanted it.

I soon found myself in debate against the supposed 'right' and 'wrong'.

Should I buy new and risk getting myself into debt that I really can't afford or do I look for another, cheaper, option?

The pro's and con's of each drew to a tie. I had no idea where to go for help or advice as I didn't know anyone that was in a similar budgeting bridal situation.

After much thought and a nudge from my sensible husband-to-be, I decided that the shop dress was a no-no. Even spending half that amount on one dress was, to me, unreasonable and selfish.

Which brings me to explain the reasoning behind this blog.

A while back I joined a bridal forum. After just a day or so of searching the threads and posts I noticed a few people talking about a cheap bridal shop online.

Now, I as well as many other ladies, have heard the horror stories about brides-to-be ordering their dresses from far flung continents such as China and America only to be either scammed with no dress ever turning up or the dress being of a very inferior quality. Both which would surely lead to absolute disappoint and complete upset, something no bride should encounter whilst planning the most important day of their life.

However the online bridal shop I had read about seemed different. There were tons of positive reviews and happy endings and although I tried very hard to find some bad press about this site and service, I really couldn't!

I scoured the site and almost immediately came across a dress I just fell completely and utterly in love with. I had no idea if I would look any good in it but I knew it was the dress I wanted.

After I had visited the bridal shop I discovered that the very same £800.00 dress I had tried on was in fact nearly identical to the dress I has spotted on the said website.

With that my mind was made up and I decided, whole heartedly, that I was going to order my dress from the Internet at a bargain price of £165.00.

This blog is to help people make their own decisions as to which bridal route they travel. Throughout the next few weeks I will be writing my experiences (good and bad) on my personal progression of buying my dress with a slight risk attached to it.

The taboo of 'buying your dress from the internet'!